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Basically, I'm Selfish
This entry was posted on 6/25/2009 8:29 AM and is filed under Secrets to Peace 2009.
Recently, an ex-subscriber to this list
wrote, "I have so little time to read
emails, I must let yours go. At first, it
seemed you wrote new, inspiring thoughts each
day. Now, it seems that every day is the same
message."
I am sharing this just to say that I have no
particular agenda with these daily
reflections except to share the astonishment
with life, which I feel. While it is
rewarding to me when someone writes that my
words have inspired them, it is not the real
purpose of my sharing. Even though I get
goose bumps when someone tells me that these
words were exactly what they needed to hear,
I do not share my discoveries with that as my
motivation.
I share, what I share, because I feel a type
of emptiness when I am not allowing my inner
discoveries to flow out of me in this manner.
I feel like I have dammed up the very energy
that keeps me vital, that contributes to my
joy, when I am not sharing my journey with
others.
My journey is not "everyone's" journey.
Well, in some ways it is, but that's an area
for exploration on another day
The point is not everyone will resonate with
the revelations which excite me. To some the
experience of being cradled in the loving
hands of the Universe is so routine, so
ordinary; my expressions of awe are somewhat
adolescent. To others the world is such an
unsafe place that my child-like wonder
appears overly Pollyannaish.
I have no desire for you to experience life
exactly as I do. If my writings have any
agenda it would be to open you up to sharing
your experience with others, so that we may
all grow, not only through our own sensory
input, but also through a appreciation of the
reality in which you live.
I do not put a lot of analysis into my
writing. I sit down and start my fingers
moving on the keyboard, and watch to see what
is seeking expression, from deep within me.
Some days I think the same thing as the
ex-subscriber. I have heard myself lament,
"Geez, is there not an original thought in
there somewhere?" But, I have this agreement
with my inner self that I will not edit or
throw out the gifts it brings forth for me.
So, most days, I simply send what I am given.
Occasionally, I would like to retract what I
have written, when a later re-reading reveals
a lack of clarity or a possible
misperception, but I have to let those days
go. I must trust my inner guidance.
For those who read these words, I am most
grateful. According to the software supplied
by my list server only about one fifth of all
the subscribers even open my mail. For a time
I felt troubled by this information, but then
I remembered that I am not seeking to teach
nor am I seeking to persuade. I send this out
simply because it thrills me.
So, I apologize to those who sometimes find
little value here, and I cherish those who
stay, even though some of those days may be
inevitable.
If nothing else may my example urge each of
you to find some vehicle of expression which
brings you as much joy as these daily musings
bring me.
That which is divine in me, recognizes,
salutes, and embraces that which is divine in
you.
I humbly thank you for being here and
investing your precious time with me.
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